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Being comfortable with change

Early in my career I took no initiative in shaping my future. I felt like my life was being shaped by external events and people, rather than by me. I came to the realisation that my career choices (or lack thereof) were harming my strengths, skills, and happiness.

I needed to be able to move out of my comfort zone and face my fears to start focusing on my strengths and what I loved to do. I also needed to stop blaming other people, things, and circumstances for where I was in life.

First though, I had to work out what I wanted to change and what I wanted to do.

These are the steps I followed. This is about creating more choice in our lives.

Step 1: Figure out what you want

Step 2: Be aware of your own responses to change

Step 3: Choose how you respond

Step 1. What do you want to achieve (desired state)?

Recognise where you are currently (present state). This includes understanding your beliefs (as well as those limiting beliefs you may have) and what you value.

Understanding your present state is just as important as knowing your desired state. It’s like discovering where the ‘x’ is on a treasure map and trying to work out how to get to it. To find the ‘x’, obviously you have to work out where the ‘you are here’ mark is as well.

Often the most difficult part is working out what it is you want to achieve. Once you know what your desired state is, then it is just a process of working out the steps to get there, or what is preventing you from getting there.

Step 2. Be aware of your responses to change

Have you thought about your comfort zone? When we are in our comfort zone we are doing the ‘same old’ stuff. We know the people we work with, we may have had the same desk for some time, we are familiar with our surroundings, the work we do is pretty much the same day to day, and we are not learning anything new.

When you are out of your comfort zone how do you respond? You may experience physical responses such as increased heart rate, sweaty palms, or a knot in the pit of your stomach. We perceive these as negative – to be avoided.

When we go through any type of change we are out of our comfort zone and we may resort to strategies to stay in our comfort zone and hence resist the change.

As human beings we crave certainty and will try to stay in our comfort zone at any cost. The willingness to feel uncomfortable and to do things that will move us out of our comfort zone is what will lead us into accepting change.

How much you want something, or want to change something, will have a direct relationship to your willingness to feel the ‘pain’ of being out of your comfort zone and stay with it until it becomes comfortable and familiar.

Step 3. Choose how you respond

Moving out your comfort zone can feel like jumping out of a plane and hoping your parachute works.

We need to shift our mindset from being stuck or a victim to exploring possibilities and becoming master of our own destiny.

Ask yourself the question, ‘how can I change my perspective and consider other options to create the change I am seeking?’

My question for you is: “How is staying in your comfort zone working for you and is it preventing you from achieving something amazing?”

We explore this and more as part of our NLP training.

Check out our NLP Training at

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