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How congruent are you - are you walking your talk?

How we can become congruent by aligning our brains 

The latest scientific research shows you have three brains! You have complex, adaptive and fully functional neural networks or 'brains' in your heart, your gut and your head.

Marvin Oka and Grant Soosalu

Congruence means saying and doing what we believe in the moment, being straightforward and honest, and saying what is true, even if it is unpleasant and not what we think others want to hear.

People intuitively sense when we are not being congruent, even if it is only to avoid hurting their feelings. When we are incongruent to temporarily smooth over a rough situation, or take the pain out of an unpleasant encounter, sooner or later it will catch up with us and the relationship will be damaged or destroyed. We may believe we are being congruent when we are not. We may be in conflict internally without necessarily recognizing that to be the case.

This is where our brain – or perhaps more accurately, our brains – become involved.Have you ever wanted to do something but that voice in your head kept preventing you from making the first move? That’s your head brain trying to tell you something. Have you ever gone ahead with something even though it didn’t feel quite right, and found that it didn’t work out?  That’s your gut brain trying to tell you something. Or have you experienced those moments when your heart just wasn’t into it, whatever ‘it’ was?  That’s your heart brain trying to tell you something.

In all of these situations, the messages from your brains are not in alignment.

My questions are

  • Are you in conflict with your thoughts – your head is saying one thing and your gut another?
  • Do you avoid acting on your goals and plans or find it difficult to be motivated?
  • Do you ever experience frustration, depression, anger or anxiety?

If yes, then you may need to align your head, heart and gut brains.


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